Nigga stole my bike
|
FACT ALERT: A nigga is probably stealing your bike right now! |
What more can be said? He's a nigga and he just loves stealing bikes. He knows he has a problem, he just can't help himself. It makes you wonder what he does with them.
The Nigga stole My Bike or simply NSMB (some times confused with National Socialist Black Metal and New Super Mario Bros.) happens more often then you may think, actually the NSMB happens from 500 to 1000 times every 6 minutes and 21 seconds all over the world. One of the first victims of the NSMB was a caucasian kid known has Little Mac, he had a seizure and went into a coma after the event, the man responsable was sued, during the trial the eye witness yelled the following sentence after the judge asked what was the victim's reaction: "NIGGA STOLE MY BIKE!". It was considered racism and the witness was arrested together with the victim who was still in a coma. After this polemic event, the Bike-Stealing Nigga Defender Association or simply BSNDA was created, wich aimed for defending the practicers of the NSMB in court.
A couple years later the NSMB was considered an every day activity, in some contries was even considered a sport. Where a black guy has to use one of the NSMB techniques to win points for the NSMB world cup.
Much like Jews & Gold, Nigras like to collect things but in their case it is others' bikes. As can be seen in the recent news clippings to the left Nigra bike theft is common place and the threat posed to all of us is equal to that of Al Gore and Furries.
He also has been known to steal phones:
He also has stolen Unicorns:
Contents |
Historical context
Early Years
In the Middle Ages, horse theft was common prior to the reconquest of Spain.
Economic collapse of America led to many bike thefts.
Involvement in 9/11
Many theories have arisen in recent years that nigga bike theft was instrumental in 9/11.
Appearances in other media
Movies
The bike stealing nigga appeared in many movies, like The Matrix and Star Wars.
Music
Bike theft was glorified in Hate It Or Love It by 50 Cent and The Game:
Coming up I was confused
My mama kissing a girl
Confusion occurs
Coming up in a cold world
Daddy aint around
Probably out committing felonies
My favorite rapper used to sing
Check, check out my melody
I wanna live good so shit I sell dope
For a four-finger ring
One of them gold ropes
Nana told me if I passed I get a sheep skin coat
If I could move a few packs
I get the hat
Now that'll be dope
Tossed and turn in my sleep that night
Woke up the next morning
Niggaz done stole my bike
Different day, same shit
Ain't nothing good in the hood
I run away from this bitch
And never come back if I could
Video Games
The 8bit Era
The 16bit era
The 32bit Era and Beyond
Portable systems
an early portable nigga bike stealer sim.
Nigga related bike theft in Pokemon.
Literature
Nigga Stole My Bike by Lil Mac, a seminal work of literature on the subject.
He also stole the bible from Jesus.
Death of the bike stealin' nigga
It has been rumored that the nigga stole bikes for many years, but recently died:
It is true that he was implicated in a sexual assault case:
